1989 - When My Reputation Preceeded Me

When I got married in '81 the kids were 11 & 13. In my attempts to impress them with my adventurous life they learned a lot about me. By the time their mom & I married I guess there were really few secrets which, on some occasions, became painfully obvious.

1989 – When My Reputation Preceded Me

The Fortune Cookie read “You are liked for your good nature.” I observed this was not a fortune. “Have you noticed?” I continued, “Fortune Cookies don’t really give you a fortune? They offer advice like ‘Be cautious in your finances’ or an observation like ‘You are liked for your good nature’ but these aren’t fortunes. ‘You will inherit money’ or ‘Your children will accidentally burn your house down’ now these are fortunes.”

“I was told that you have to add your own circumstance to the end of a fortune cookie.” Terri said, “I was told to always say ‘In Bed’ after all fortune cookie messages…like ‘You are liked for your good nature…in bed.’”

“I’ve never heard that before!” I said. “Hey! It works for almost everything! Be cautious in your finances…in bed. You will inherit money…in bed. Your children will burn your house down…in bed.”

“You have superior judgment…in bed.” Said Ken. “It works!”

“Your friends find you fascinating…in bed!” Said my wife.

“You find pleasure in work and play…in bed!” Said Terri.

We sat talking and joking in our favorite Chinese Restaurant having just treated our son, my step-son, to a pre-wedding meal. In 2-days Ken and Terri would be married and, as their schedule was so full with events and planning in their last frantic phase, this would be our only chance to take them out for a casual supper together before the wedding.

Eventually they would start a family from which I would get 3-brand-new grandchildren, Alan, Jamie and Ryan. They are all brilliant children with obvious unlimited potential. But, for now, Ken and Terri were still a young couple with their future unlimited.

“Did you know Fortune Cookies were invented in San Francisco?” I asked showing off my great command of useless trivia, “They were intended to be eaten before the meal as a form of entertainment while waiting in line for a table.” I looked up at each of them with a big smile on my face. Conversation stopped. They all looked back silently with no expression whatsoever then, spontaneously, the conversation continued as though I had never spoken. I was sure they rehearsed moments like this.

Terri mentioned she was relieved to be out at a quiet supper as the previous night had been her bachelorette party. She revealed she had gone out with several of her girlfriends and partied one of her last “free” nights away. With that Ken revealed his Bachelor Party was this very evening by, “Well, I guess I’d better get going. You guys can sit and talk awhile but I’ve got to get going. A bunch of the guys are waiting for me for my bachelor party.” He turned to Terri, “Don’t wait up.”

“Whoa!” I said, “Bachelor Party? I didn’t know tonight was your Bachelor Party! Why didn’t you let me know?”

“I didn’t think you’d be interested! Of course you’re welcome to come along!”

“I’d love to,” I said, “but I need a little more warning before I go out to party nowadays…I just can’t party like I used to!”

“Larry,” Ken said, and paused. At that moment conversation stopped. They were all awaiting Ken’s next words. He turned towards me, looked me in the eye and shook his head, “believe me…NONE of us can party like you used to.”